The family is a small society, and any society that aspires to live in harmony, sooner or later began to live by the rules. For certain specific laws. In a good family there are always rules, small laws, and best of all, if these rules take care of all members of the family. And about the freedom and joy of the younger ones, and about the tasks and tranquility of the elders. On the rights of both men and women. Good rules are rules that are understandable and simple, if necessary - with the indicated stiffness: hard and soft. Rigid - this is mandatory, it is not discussed and must be performed under any circumstances. Soft - "it would be desirable", "we will focus on this as far as possible."
Laws in society and laws in the family
At one time there were no laws in the society, they were born from existing customs, were formulated (codified) and somehow - were written. If they were composed successfully, they became a law for many.
Under the leadership of the Emperor Justinian, "Corpus Juris Civilis" was created (the Code of Civil Law), most European states still follow these rules. The next strongest contribution to the development of legislation was made by Napoleon, Napoleon s code is not only the basis of French legislation to this day, it is also the legal basis of modern Europe. Successful compositions!
The society has long understood that it is impossible to live without laws. But it is interesting that in small societies, in families - people live without distinct laws, do not create laws for themselves. Result? In a family where there is no law, sooner or later a change of love comes chaos. Conflicts and divorces.
Presence and adherence to rules is the main difference between a mass and a civilized family.
Presence and adherence to rules is the main difference between a mass and a civilized family. In a civilized family, there are always and usually spontaneously formed those or other rules of the family. These rules can concern both the relationship between the spouses, and many other issues: the daily routine, relationships with parents, relatives and friends. In a civilized family where there are children, it is usually natural, in one way or another, to form rules for the child and rules that organize the relationship between parents and children. In order not to forget and work better, these rules are often recorded.
Kinds of family rules
• The contract on creation of the personal budget on mutually advantageous conditions
• How to discuss disagreements: a method "Repeat, agree, add".
• Blackboard method
• Rules for the child
• Family constitution
• Family contract
• Family code
Try it on yourself
Rules should be tried on yourself like a suit or shoes: very carefully. Rules suitable for one can not be categorically approached by others. It is recommended that you get acquainted with this, see what is best for you. Either they simply answered the questions of the Questionnaire, got acquainted with the vision of everyone, what kind of family we see. We saw the specifics - and well done. Either the family constitution is suitable, or the family statute, which can be their own in every family.
And the one who has already begun to live this way - it is clear that he simply does not want to live in another family. We are addicted and can accidentally drive on another person. There are some questions - let s go through the constitution, what do we have written there? Looked - figured out, and someone without insult scratching the head "I m sorry, was not right."
How to teach a partner to live by the rules
There are people who are ready to comply with reasonable rules, but there are those who do not want to live by the rules in principle. In any case, the question usually arises, how to teach a partner to live by the rules
