Demanding in the Curve Love
A man in the curve of love expects much from the "object of adoration" and requires little from himself.
Demanding in right love
A man in right love makes demands first of all to himself, not to his beloved.
I have obligations only in relation to myself. How I behave, how I love you, how I do something about you ... That’s all. I have obligations to myself, but not requirements to you.
How does the beloved behave, does it do what I consider it compulsory for me to do? I will not think about it, I will deliberately take myself away from the evaluations of someone I love. Will my beloved behave 100%, 80% or 30% - I do not look at it. The task of the beloved is to just BE. I just need to know that she is just IS.
I know: you love me exactly as much as you do it. I know, I see that you want it, that you are looking for it. And then - the issues of health, state, mood, fatigue, etc. My job is to help you. But I can not evaluate you and put your marks. This is fundamentally wrong, and I do not ask myself such questions.
Evaluation and exactingness is only one: the beloved should not go over some lower bound.
If a loved one starts drinking, rioting or swearing, then it s just not my favorite. My beloved has one task - to remain myself, the one that I already know and love. Do not change yourself, do not fall below a certain level. It is necessary. But that s all. See →
What love from what grows
What kind of love - it largely depends on what lies at its basis: physiology or social stereotypes, feelings or reason, the soul is healthy and rich - or lonely and discouraged ... Love based on choice usually correct and more often healthy, although with a curved head martyr variants are possible.
Right love is in caring for who lives and not in tears about who has gone and who is lost. A person in right love makes demands first of all to himself, and not to his beloved.
Of sexual desire usually grows Love-I want. Of neurotic affection, almost always grows sick love, love suffering, sometimes covered by a romantic touch.
The love of each of us is a reflection of our personality, and our common to people and life, the development of our perceptual positions largely determines the kind and nature of our love. See →