Family rituals

Family rituals are the unwritten laws of the family, produced by habit and persuasion. that this is correct. Their rituals are in every family - it’s little things that are always done and about which no one conducts discussions, it is necessary to do this or not. This means such trifles as greetings and farewells, a walk at the entrance to the apartment, washing hands before meals, brushing teeth, fastening in the car, etc.

Family rituals are respected only if all members of the family fulfill them. For example, you can teach your son to sit in the toilet, only if the father does it. Or "every morning will start with a healthy breakfast" - it will not be a ritual if you are pacing yourself in the morning with a cup of coffee and a cigarette in your mouth.

Good and bad family rituals

Not all rituals are good. Many repeat for their parents: "Take your elbows off the table!" "They do not talk over food!" "Children should remain silent when adults talk." Even the beat of the child was a ritual in many families.

Only those rituals that help community and mutual support are good. Examples of good rituals:

• Good morning - and kiss!

• Common meal. If possible, it is very good to gather once a day at a common table - both for eating and talking! If everyone makes his own sandwich, lunch is heated in the microwave all individually, and dinner is held in front of the TV, the community is lost.

• Ritual of a family evening. It’s great when there is such a regular evening ritual in the family: always at the same time, always the same. It ends with a common game or a fairy tale, a child can rely on a good end of the day and rejoice, anticipating it. See →

• Family responsibilities of the child. Small responsibilities, affordable for the child, can also be a ritual. Bedding, unloading dishes from the dishwasher. It is best that this is a permanent task at the same time.

• Time only for the child

Rituals: why do they need a child?

Author of the article Anna Ponomarenko

Preschool children love rituals very much. It is important for them to know what, when and in what sequence will occur see →. First I look "Good night, kids," then I go swimming, then I put on my pajamas, my mother brings me milk, I embrace the bear, my mother hides me and kisses me. All is well, everything is as usual, you can sleep. But if suddenly the bear was offended somewhere, or my mother speaks on the phone and still does not go to kiss - the guard. The child can not fall asleep, turns, cries, and suffers. It’s not whims - it’s really bad. Smart parents know that it’s useless to be ashamed and admonished - it’s easier to turn on the light, announce a family work and find a bear.

It should be noted that ritual behavior in older children and adults can be a cause for concern (see →), whereas in preschool age it is perfectly normal.

Here are examples of such rituals in children:

• Drink (or eat) only from your favorite cup (from your favorite plate)

• The child refuses to discard old shoes that are already small, even if you bought new ones

• The desire to listen to the same fairy tale many times

• the desire to watch the same cartoon many times.

Particularly important rituals of meeting and parting. It will come in handy when the kid goes to a kindergarten or school. A special kiss or a handshake, high five (greeting with palms or fists), tickling, winking, etc. In unfamiliar situations, rituals help to overcome stress. If your daughter or your son likes to read books for the night, be sure to grab the book when you fly on an airplane to another country or spend the night in a hotel or a guest.

Rituals help family members feel like a family. In every family, whatever it is - expanded or nuclear, ordinary or large, and even Swedish - there are "jokes", customs, traditions. Rituals strengthen family values, unite the family, especially in unstable times.

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